Just A Dog

The Science Of Kissing

(CNN) -- There's nothing like a romantic kiss. It is the climax of every great love story and an experience that has motivated poets and musicians for thousands of years. It's also a wonderful example of a behavior that is both nature and nurture. Humans have an instinctive drive to connect through kissing, but the style and expression is shaped by our culture and personal experiences.

Beneath the surface, a kiss serves as the ultimate litmus test for a relationship. It can urge us to pursue a deeper connection with someone special or act as a warning to back off when something just doesn't feel right. Science is finally beginning to unravel the mystery of how this happens.

While we don't often think of them in this way, human lips are the body's most exposed erogenous zone. Packed with sensitive nerve endings, even a light brush sends a cascade of information to our brains helping us to decide whether we want to continue and what might happen next.

Lip contact involves five of our 12 cranial nerves as we engage all of our senses to learn more about a partner. Electric impulses bounce between the brain, lips, tongue and skin, which can lead to the feeling of being on a natural "high" because of a potent cocktail of chemical messengers involved.

A passionate kiss acts like a drug, causing us to crave the other person thanks to a neurotransmitter called dopamine. This is the same substance involved in taking illegal substances such as cocaine, which is why the novelty of a new romance can feel so addictive. Dopamine is involved in sensations of reward, making us feel intense desire that can lead to feelings of euphoria, insomnia, and loss of appetite, and it is only one actor in the great chemical ballet happening in our bodies.

And then there are physical changes. A kiss can cause our blood vessels to dilate, our pulse to quicken and cheeks to flush. Our pupils grow wide, which is likely one reason that so many of us are apt to close our eyes. In other words, the body's response mirrors many of the same symptoms frequently associated with falling in love.

But let's be honest; not every kiss leaves us wanting more.

Evolutionary psychologists at The State University of New York at Albany recently reported that 59% of men and 66% of women say that they have ended a budding relationship because of a bad kiss. How is it that such a seemingly simple exchange has the power to influence attraction dramatically?

We can readily describe sensations of butterflies in the stomach or feeling weak in the knees when things go well, but we are less aware of the ways that kissing helps us to make a reliable assessment of another person. An often-overlooked organ that's intimately involved in the experience is the nose.

Beyond obvious mood spoilers such as poor hygiene and bad breath, we each have a distinct natural scent that appears to guide us toward choosing a partner with compatible DNA. Scientists have found that women prefer the scents of men with a complementary set of genes that code for the immune system. The benefit may be that if children come along down the line, they would be well-equipped to ward off disease.

Of course, some people worry about the way that a kiss also puts us in very close proximity to another person's germs. But in reality, we're more likely to get sick by shaking hands throughout the day than by kissing.

It's necessary to include one important caveat: There seems to be a rise in the number of young people biting each other to express affection.

This may be due, in part, to vampires in Hollywood making the exchange look extremely good on the big screen. However, biting your loved ones is the least appropriate way to show you care because injecting potentially dangerous viruses and bacteria directly into someone's blood stream can be deadly.

Blood-sucking aside, kissing allows us to cross normal social boundaries and get close enough for a reliable sample of scent, taste and possibly pheromones providing insight into long-term compatibility. In other words, there's more to a kiss than meets the lips.

We may not be actively aware of all of the significant ways our bodies respond, but kisses are powerful clues to evaluate when to pursue a relationship and when to move on. Fortunately, understanding the real chemistry involved doesn't take any of the magic out of the moment, but it might boost the odds of leaving a lasting impression.

Editor's note: Sheril Kirshenbaum is the author of "The Science of Kissing" and a research scientist at The University of Texas at Austin. She spoke last year at the TED Global conference in Edinburgh, Scotland.

Art by Adam Martinakis

Are You An Empath?

An interesting article written by an Empath.  I'm sure you, too, will find it a fantastic read.

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Imagine being able to feel and sense everything, whether positive or negative around you, 24/7. An Empath can’t turn off empathy (unlike someone who is perhaps ‘empathising’). It is possibly one of the most challenging of psychic gifts to master. I am an Empath who has spent nearly two decades, since awakening, mastering my empathic nature. It is an on

going process. I am still not perfect and not sure that I ever will be whilst incarnated here. I am however content, despite the challenges of integration, as I see it as an incredible gift to humanity…

Empaths incarnate into this world without a manual. Some seem quite blessed in that they bring with them the memories of mastery from past lives. Even then, the remembering is often a bumpy journey in itself. To add to the confusion, most Empaths cannot tell the difference between their own energy and someone else’s. Something happened on my journey where I just ‘got’ the difference. It came from increased presence. There is a subtle vibrational difference that we can discern when we are fully present. Constantly attaining presence within spiritual evolution is a very important key to mastering empathic gifts that I cannot over emphasise.

Everything is energy

Everything is energy, pulsating particular vibrations. Since an Empath feels energy, just like a living person breaths air, it is understandable why a few issues might arise as an earth-incarnated-being. Humanity (apart from perhaps indigenous cultures), is one big confusing energetic vibrational mess! The modern world is a melting pot of fractured and frantic energies: for example, loaded emotional projection, hidden agendas (whether personal or global), wi-fi, mobile phone radiation, electric gadget emissions, multi media marketing designed to allure and captivate, highly processed foods, TV, the thudding din of consumerism… the list goes on and on.

Empaths will feel the energy in the field, feel the energy of conversation, feel body language, feel words used (or not used) without intellectual interpretation. They will intuitively know what an energy is ‘really’ about despite what is conveyed on the surface. They will also know what a person is really saying, no matter what words are being offered.

Because of the tendency for people to hide the full story, or try to control the situation, an empath will tend to feel a huge inner conflict or inability to process the enormity of the engagement. One of the main problems for Empaths is the lack of transparency and honesty in the world and the consequent resentment of having to process all the energy that is not in full view. Of course lots of of these sensitive beings struggle also with things that are in full view too.

“Make it go away!!!”

Most people who have this trait do not see it as a gift. I would more often expect to hear the pleading cries to make it stop. Initially, it often involves being so overwhelmed with feeling energy that it is challenging to function in an ordinary sense. Empaths often come across as over emotional, at times others become emotionally detached in order to cope. It wouldn’t be unusual that they might just ‘freak out’, without apparent cause. They often prefer their own company and don’t like to build many personal relationships.

In my early days I used to cry out to the universe
“I don’t want to feel all this energy – it’s not mine”…

the universe would always reply that it is a gift.
“How on earth is this a gift!!!”

I often found it difficult to get close to people in a personal ‘every day’ sense. It would drive me nuts, so I would prefer independence or distance. Independence and contentment with only a couple of close friends still feels very natural to me. In a way, it’s a saving grace.
Powerful impetus to sort it out

The initial overwhelming intensity served a wonderful purpose for me. It evoked a powerful yearning to master my unique configuration here as an earth-being. It created the impetus for me to come to terms with my natural born empath traits and master them, eventually finding a high altitude of peace and functionability with it all.

The importance of releasing emotional attachment
Releasing emotional attachment is the main key to mastery. Most Empaths suffer needlessly because they cannot release their personal emotional attachment to feelings. If we let go of attachment, it doesn’t mean we won’t feel. It just means that we don’t get tangled in the feeling anymore. It means we can watch as things happen and really discern that ‘that isn’t us’, ‘that isn’t our own feeling’ and really begin to embrace when we are DIVINELY GIVEN to take action or not.

For me this involved years of becoming consciously aware and centred. Once I started coming from a centred place of presence, I began to discern what I was meant to do, releasing emotional attachment to both that which is not meant for me and that which was. This is a very powerful factor as it means that we can still feel the energy empathically, but it doesn’t bother us adversely any more. We are able to act of infinitely more divine service when we are not attached emotionally. In fact unless we come from this place, we would tend to make a situation worse not better. That’s the bottom line. It means we feel the energy with the deepest compassion, yet we can truly hold the space for another. In so doing, we reflect the light of benevolence, allowing true healing to take place.

Finding inner peace and stability

Daily centering, meditation practice, yoga, compassionate eating, conscious lifestyle, conscious choices that cleanse our energy field and promote centredness will all help big time! Being in nature serves to recentre and recharge depleted energies. Spending regular time in solitude away from idle chatter and drama can be invaluable. I would say that making sure that a bare minimum of half an hour per day consciously looking after yourself is crucial. The more the better. The above are very important. There may also be many other ways, such as swimming in the ocean, hill walking, having a bath with oils or salt, giving yourself a foot massage, listening to your favourite music, playing an instrument, conscious bodywork or massage… basically whatever it is that helps you maintain balance and build up your sense of inner peace and stability.

Another important key is ownership. If you have the trait, then to deny it just makes it worse and ensures that our spiritual evolution is dysfunctional. Our evolution will happen when we embrace our unique configuration. So we need to be 100% honest with ourselves and know that it will get much easier the more and more present with become with it. The only way out is through.

Without these practices it is very difficult (I am not sure if it is even possible) to master being an empath here. So if the motivation is a little lacking, JUST DO IT anyway until you find a rhythm to your daily life that you see working.

A true gift of benevolence

So whether you are an empath or you know one personally, hopefully this is helpful in some way.

I truly believe that, the challenges as highlighted are there to help us refine and alchemically transform this true gift of benevolence. The gifts of empathy have the power to really make a difference in this world. This is what most people who feel the call of Divine Service long for, to be able to help others in a life changing way.

An evolved Empath has the natural ability to connect on a Soul level, helping to release blocked energy with another. An Empath, if given, can also release coagulated energy within the field at large, discerning between what is benevolent and what is not. Since everything oscillates a frequency that can inadvertently influence everything around it, then a truly benevolent Empath realigning the energy field can help make a huge difference in terms of spiritual evolution.

Whether an Empath not, if we can all work together with our gifts we can allow this higher paradigm of to unfold together.

Author: Trinity Bourne

Source: WakeUp-World.com